PDFI'm a Home Depot, Lowes kinda girl. Like tools and shit like that-but still very much a girly-girl. I bought this print of the original drawing of the Brooklyn Bridge, but couldn't find a frame for it, because it is 15x60. So I decide fugg it, I'll make the frame myself. I wanted the frame to be a "floating" frame...to mimic the bridge (I know it's fuggin GENIUS) I ordered the glass so it was on it's way. So I do a rough sketch of what I wanted the frame to look like- simple to wooden anchors with two sheets of glass with the print floating in between. So I go to Lowes and buy a saw, a 2x4x96 stud, safety goggles and gloves. So I get home and realized I had a problem- I didn't have a work horse (bench to cut wood and the like). It was raining outside so I couldn't use anything for leverage out there either. So, I decide to cut it in the house MacGyver style. So while I planned how I was gonna cut the fuggin piece of wood I charged up the saw. Light bulb goes off and I realize that I can use the cut out in my kitchen. The ledge was high enough and the stud was long enough to reach the stove-providing steady support. So I put the blade on the saw, secured it, put on my gloves and goggles and marked up the stud for my cuts. I flip the safety to engage the saw and we're off and running. I start to make the first cut got part way through and the saw jams. I hit the safety and back the saw up. PILE OF DUST on the floor. I go for round two and successfully complete the cut. I figure shiiiiiiiiid- I AM THE WOMAN- I GOT THIS.
So it's time for the second cut, but now I have a problem. The stud is 15 in shorter than before and now I don't have the support I need. I think for a moment and lo and behold there's my dog (Jack Russell Terrier). I think well I could use him to steady the board. NOW BEFORE YOU GO AND CALL THE PETA &ASPCA &ANIMAL CONTROL, ANIMAL CRUELTY- NO ANIMALS IN THIS STORY WERE HARMED.
So underneath the ledge is a bar stool. I put him on the bar stool and position the stud, thinking he could do the trick. But he starts fidgeting and wants to get down. I thought at that point, this wasn't gonna work. So I take him down and he shoots me a SEOD and goes off somewhere. After a moment the light bulb goes off again and I decide that I can SIT on the stud on the ledge because my weight can hold the stud steady as I cut it. So I hop up on the ledge and straddle the stud (yes I know how that sounds). I thought for a moment that what I was doing was dangerous and I could seriously injure myself if I wasn't careful. So I flip the safety on the saw and begin cutting. Part way through again the saw jams and I begin to fall backward. I managed to engage the safety to turn the saw off and I land on my back on the stud (in the laying down suspended in the air position). I was shocked that the stud didn't break beneath me. So after getting myself together I go in for part 2 of the cut to finish it off. I hop back on the ledge and finish. The ledge caught a small nick but nothing serious- I know it's there.
So the frame is proudly displayed on my living room wall.
The End
PS-SPECIAL SEOD TO BLOGGER FOR BEING AN ASS AND NOT LETTING ME LOAD PICS FOR MY STORY. *ROLLS EYES*
